I was born in Christian community. I went to church every Sunday. All my life, anything that happened, God was in it. When I was 13, something tragic had happened to me. From that day my life was heading downwards. I became depressed. Whenever I am depressed, I cut myself to ease the psychological pain. I became addicted to cutting myself. My life went from being worse to worsen. To run away from my problem and life, I did drugs just to fill the void inside me. The church was supposed to be a hospital for the broken. I was broken. Instead of bring me in, my church pushed me away. They were judgmental, they gossiped, and they had hatreds. So I thought to myself, “How can you preach about God of love if all you do after that is judge people?” So I blamed God for most of my problems, and I set up my journey to hate people that involve with God. One night, I let the devil get into my head. He filled me with these thoughts that the world would a happy place if I killed myself. So I tried, I locked up the room and attempt to stab myself. I tried to experience before hand, and I was ready. Before I was ready to stab myself, I had these thoughts of reaching out to God because I didn’t want to go to hell. So I prayed to God, told God to take away my problems, my pains, my depressions, my hatreds, and my suicidal thoughts. From that time, I felt something different inside me. I felt the power of God reaching down on me. I felt relieved, and I went to bed. The next morning, I woke up and felt the transformation working it me. I saw the grass was greener, and I was smiling. I was dead and now I am alive. I was lost and now I am found. After 2 years past, I can boldly and unashamed to say that Jesus saved me. Now I accept that Jesus suffered and died for me on the cross, I live unashamed to proclaim his name to the world.